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Dude Watches – Tango & Cash

by Will Dutcher on September 21, 2016

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This week, we finish out our buddy movie picks with the 1989 bomb, Tango & Cash. It stars Kurt Russel (Gabriel Cash) in his action star prime, and a clean-cut Sylvester Stallone (Ray Tango). The plot focuses on a non-nonsensical Jack Palance and his aim to slowly destroy our hero cops. Action and bad-acting ensue, along with with some huge jaws, a ponytail, and a slinky. The end result is a blown up crime-lord, executed ne’er-do-wells, and a now-dysfunctional rock quarry.

This movie has its issues, to be very clear. The acting is bad, in many parts, from the stars to the extras. The directing of this movie is legendary, as it went through multiple angles with multiple ideas of how this movie should be. Stallone wanted it to be a serious action flick while Jon Peters (producer) wanted it to be ‘campier.’ The editing of this movie is a clear mish-mash of both ideals as the attempts to be serious fall flat, while the goofiness goes a little rigid.

First of all, the characters of this movie are also so bad they’re good! There are baddies such as “The Jaw,” the Aussie (or is he English?) Requin, and the wholly unnecessary Quan and Lopez. There are support characters like Michael Jeter’s Skinner, Clint Howard’s “Slinky” and Michael J. Pollard’s Owen. Our stars, Tango, Cash, and Yves Perret are caricatures of what unhinged cops and crazy bad guy bosses are. From the one-liners to the Kurt-Russel-in-drag to the questionable prison protocols, this movie is off the rails–and I enjoyed it!

We get into some other bad movie tropes and actors from the era and compare this movie to some other movies of that time. Movies like Hard TargetRobocop, etc. can draw some comparisons because while they’re different movies, they share that camp that isn’t directly intended, but comes across in thick layers when they mean to be serious.

In summary, this movie attempts to inject humor in-betwixt action scenes, and it’s all late 80s awesome. If you enjoyed action movies from the late 80s and early 90s, you may like this. Or you may be like Caleb and Cord and give it at best a middling score. But you can’t come away from this movie without feeling extremely for or against this movie. There’s so much bad stuff that sticks with you that you can’t help but recall it with laughter or admiration.

Stay with us for next week’s movie, because we discuss another one of Will’s movie picks, Diggstown, starring James Woods and Louis Gosset, Jr. This is probably going to be my favorite movie in the last couple months!

Let us know what you think and leave a comment below or on our Facebook page. Your opinions matter! And if you have a series or a movie we should check out, let us know! Give us a review on iTunes, and if you’d like to catch up on our other episodes of Dude Watches, including Seasons 1 and 2 of The Leftovers, click here.

Caleb (@OriginalCaleb) (rafehatescaleb.com)

Cord (@TooFewWhales)

Will (@Ramtrap)

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Dude Watches – Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure

by Will Dutcher on September 14, 2016

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When an individual thinks of a buddy movie, what components jump to the forefront of their mind? Is the natural chemistry between the main characters? Is it their need to come together to overcome impossible odds? Or is it their genuine love for all mankind which seasons their tale and establishes their legend as one to be remembered for all time? For me, it’s most definitely all three. This sounds like an impossible formula to fill. However, Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure provides the perfect storm for these factors to coalesce.

The exploits of Bill S. Preston, Esquire and Ted ‘Theodore’ Logan usher in a veritable sea change for the residents of San Dimas, CA in 1988. In the span of just a few hours, Bill & Ted embark on a most excellent adventure to procure history’s most well-known luminaries. These icons include Napoleon, Mr. The Kid (Billy the Kid), So-Crates (Socrates). There’s also Beeth-Oven (Ludwig Von Beethoven), Ms. Of Arc (Joan of Arc), Genghis Khan. Lastly, you can’t forget to mention Sigmund Frude (Sigmund Freud), princess babes, and of course Abraham Lincoln. Along the way there are incest jokes (shut up, Ted!) and plenty of plot holes but regardless, Cord and Caleb love this movie. Will on the other hand has to be a bummer dude.

Through the discussion of Bill & Ted’s excellent adventure, their bogus journey is mentioned, as well as thought experiments surrounding time travel and parallel dimensions. All in all, we had fun with this movie and believe you would too. In the end, whether you love Bill & Ted or find them most non-triumphant – remember, be excellent to each other and PARTY ON, DUDE!!

Let us know what you think and leave a comment below or on our Facebook page. Your opinions matter! And if you have a series or a movie we should check out, let us know! Give us a review on iTunes, and if you’d like to catch up on our other episodes of Dude Watches, including Seasons 1 and 2 of The Leftovers, click here.

Caleb (@OriginalCaleb) (rafehatescaleb.com)

Cord (@TooFewWhales)

Will (@Ramtrap)

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Dude Watches – Kiss Kiss Bang Bang

by Cord Culver on August 31, 2016

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Hey folks, in this week’s episode of Dude Watches, the gang goes all buddy. And by that we mean, we’re doing Buddy Films. Laurel and Hardy, Pryor and Wilder, and Cheech and Chong. Also, Smith and Lawrence, Farley and Spade, Wilson and Vaughn. And don’t forget Pegg and Frost, Redford and Newman, Hanks and Ryan*– you get where we’re going. To kick off this trilogy of buddy films, we’re taking on Shane Black’s 2005 Kiss Kiss Bang Bang starring Robert Downey Jr., Val Kilmer and Michelle Monaghan.

(*Jerk editor note: Will thinks Cord was adding buddy tandems to meet a word count)

In true Dude OMG fashion, we have every intention of discussing what happens in this film. However, what actually happens is Cord and Caleb just end up criticizing Will’s rating of the film. While he admits to laughing at one-liners (we even role-play some of them for you) he couldn’t find it in his heart of hearts to rate Kiss Kiss Bang Bang more than a 4/10 stars. So, like good friends, we try to get to the root of Will’s issues. We help him see that he’s just plain wrong and that this is a wonderful movie. Caleb and Cord both agree on a solid 8/10 and thus, by majority, are correct*.

(*Jerk editor note: Will notes that 8 + 8 + 4 = 20 / 3 = 6 3/4 average)

Caleb shares his love of Michelle Monaghan, Will and Cord role-play, Cord shares his love of all things Shane Black. Hell! We could do a whole podcast volume on Shane Black movies– the Lethal Weapon series, The Last Boyscout, Last Action Hero, The Long Kiss Goodnight, Monster Squad#squish. Caleb talks strong gay characters and how pitch perfect awesome Val Kilmer is, and thus another Dude Watches is born. Be sure to stick with us during this volume as we also watch Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure. We may also possibly take on Bill and Ted’s Bogus Journey just for funsies. Following that, the 80s CLASSIC Tango & Cash is on the docket. And before you say anything, you’re wrong, Tango & Cash is a 10/10– got it, Square Throat!?

Anyway, tune-in, buddy– you’ll want to high five us after Perret’s compound blows up. #JackPalance

Finally, Rest in Peace, Gene Wilder. You comic prince.

Let us know what you think and leave a comment below or on our Facebook page. Your opinions matter! And if you have a series or a movie we should check out, let us know! Give us a review on iTunes, and if you’d like to catch up on our other episodes of Dude Watches, including Seasons 1 and 2 of The Leftovers, click here.

Caleb (@OriginalCaleb) (rafehatescaleb.com)

Cord (@TooFewWhales)

Will (@Ramtrap)

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Dude Watches – Stranger Things (Season 1)

by Cord Culver on August 17, 2016

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Hey folks, this week the gang discusses the magically wonderful awesomeness of Stranger Things. For those of you just getting Netflix or crawling out from under a rock, Stranger Things is an eight episode series that follows the lives of four friends after their friend Will goes missing. A mysterious girl with telekinetic powers named Eleven shows up in town; is she an alien? Where did Will go? How does she have powers? Why is her name Eleven? Don’t worry, all of these questions are answered and more. Not by us of course, for that you’ll have to watch the show! However, we will discuss our favorite characters and our love of the score. We’ll also discuss the influence of Stephen King’s IT on the Duffer Brothers, and where we think the future of the show is going.

Taking place in middle-America in the 1980s, Stranger Things is a love letter to Stephen King stories of the decade. The premise of Stranger Things is simple, there is a creature that has been traveling between dimensions, depicted as the Upside Down, the opposite of the Earthly plain, and hunting humans. When one of their friends, Will, goes missing, Mike, Dustin and Lucas, and the rest of the town, go looking to find him. At the same time that Will goes missing, a mysterious young girl named Eleven shows up. She’s scared and on the run and the people that help her seem to end up dead. With a mysterious government agency seemingly pulling the strings, the entire town is caught in the middle of an inter-dimensional rescue mission and battle to save to Will and Eleven.

Let us know what you think and leave a comment below or on our Facebook page. Your opinions matter! And if you have a series or a movie we should check out, let us know! Give us a review on iTunes, and if you’d like to catch up on our other episodes of Dude Watches, including Seasons 1 and 2 of The Leftovers, click here.

Caleb (@OriginalCaleb) (rafehatescaleb.com)

Cord (@TooFewWhales)

Will (@Ramtrap)

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Dude Watches – Ghostbusters (1984)

by Will Dutcher on August 3, 2016

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It was finally Will’s turn to pick a movie we grew up with and he did not disappoint! Caleb, Cord and Will watched the original Ivan Reitman film, Ghostbusters. Furthermore, this film did not disappoint in entertainment, nostalgia, or comedy. Will thought this was by far the most solid pick over Monster Squad and Army of Darkness, but it may be a little unfair. Ghostbusters is a well-regarded movie in all rights, perfectly directed, produced, acted; it’s in a league of it’s own in comparison. Note: while we briefly discussed the 2016 all-woman release of Ghostbusters, that was not the movie we wanted to see.

This is the first movie Will remembers seeing in the movie theater, which is surprising because it came out in the summer of 1984. Yes, Will is old. He can distinctly remember being haunted during the opening scene with the library ghost screaming at the camera. It gave him nightmares for weeks.

The movie takes place in New York and revolves around three ‘scientists’ and a guy who answered a want ad. Ghosts were flying all around the city while Gozor making his return with a little help from his homies Zuul and Vince Clortho. We talk about the plot, and how New York gets a weird shout out at the end, how there was a weird conspiracy with Ernie Hudson, and how hot (or not) Sigourney Weaver is. Many memorable scenes were discussed to include, “It’s true–the man has no dick.”

Bill Murray was outstanding and funny. Harold Ramis played perfect deadpan. Dan Aykroyd was the loveable idiot. and Ernie Hudson was–and I hate to say it–the token minority. It felt forced. Rumor is the part was written for Eddie Murphy. Who knows what kind of movie it would have been if he were in it!?Sigourney Weaver was probably Will’s least favorite, but Caleb and Cord enjoyed her. Finally, Rick Moranis played the loveable idiot without a ghostbusting gun.

The next time we meet up, we’ll be discussing the entire 8-episode run of Netflix’s series, “Stranger Things” starring Winona Ryder and Matthew Modine. It’s a sci-fi/thriller about a boy that goes missing while a girl named Eleven is found. There are faceless monsters, a breathing wall, and dead children in the series. Preview review: in conclusion, it’s creepy, but very good!

Let us know what you think and leave a comment below or on our Facebook page. We want to hear from you! And if you have a series or a movie we should check out, let us know! Give us a review on iTunes, and if you’d like to catch up on our other episodes of Dude Watches, including Seasons 1 and 2 of The Leftovers, click here.

Caleb (@OriginalCaleb) (rafehatescaleb.com)

Cord (@TooFewWhales)

Will (@Ramtrap)

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Dude Watches – Army of Darkness

by Will Dutcher on July 20, 2016

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We’re back with another blast from the past! The Dudes sat through (as best they could) Sam Raimi’s Army of Darkness. This movie starred Bruce Campbell and a bunch of other people you’ve probably never heard of. It was released in 1992 and centered around an ancient magic book (the Necronomicon) needing to be retrieved in order to quell an evil from purging the earth. Our hero, Ash (Bruce Campbell), is somehow sent back in time at just the right moment to save the day.

Ash figures he’s in the 1300’s. His car is a trash heap, as it’s just been traversing time and space to end up in what may be England, as the entire cast (save the baddies–aka, Deadites–and Ash) have heavy, theatrical British accents. He meets Sheila (a popular name in the 14th century?) who took him for a traitor at first, then a prospective hero. Ash goes to get the book. There are horribly choreographed fights and badly acted lines and camp, galore. Ash wins.

This movie is the very definition of a B movie. I, personally, enjoyed the fact that Bruce Campbell had fun with the movie. The Deadites, led by a made-up Bruce Campbell, also had fun with their roles. The rest of the cast laid their acting on pretty thick–like hair gel (#Episode30). There were plenty of eye roll moments and bad jokes and awful effects, but the movie’s soul knew what it was. It wasn’t trying to win an Oscar, nor was it taking itself so seriously as to think it was anything other than campy and, for all intents and purposes, a bad movie–and that’s what I dug about it.

I don’t know if I’m going to watch this movie, myself, ever again, but it’s got me interested in the lore. The first two Evil Dead movies have some acclaim and an interesting back-story on how they came to be. Give us a listen and you’ll find out more. Keep updated by subscribing and you’ll be advised of all the most recent content we put up. Next week, we’re taking another trip down memory lane with another childhood favorite, Ghostbusters. This is a movie that I hold in high regard, as do the others, and it’s also the first movie I saw in a theater. Can’t wait to watch it again!

Let us know what you think and leave a comment below or on our Facebook page. We want to hear from you! And if you have a series or a movie we should check out, let us know! Give us a review on iTunes, and if you’d like to catch up on our other episodes of Dude Watches, including Seasons 1 and 2 of The Leftovers, click here.

Caleb (@OriginalCaleb) (rafehatescaleb.com)

Cord (@TooFewWhales)

Will (@Ramtrap)

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Dude Watches – The Monster Squad

June 22, 2016
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Podcast: Play in new window | DownloadSubscribe: iTunes | Android | RSSWelcome back to another special edition of Dude Watches! This week, Cord is back with us as we tackle he and Caleb’s childhood darling of a movie, “The Monster Squad.” This is a story of a group of rapscallions who form a Monster Club. They […]

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Dude Watches – Captain America: Civil War

June 15, 2016
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Podcast: Play in new window | DownloadSubscribe: iTunes | Android | RSSYeah, we’re late. Captain America: Civil War came out over a month ago and we’re just now getting to post this! Caleb saw this movie, himself. Maybe with friends. Maybe with family. Who really knows? Will saw this with his wife (who fell asleep […]

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Dude Watches – 11-22-63 – S1E8

June 8, 2016
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Podcast: Play in new window | DownloadSubscribe: iTunes | Android | RSSWell. We’ve come to the end of the road. The finale of 11.22.63, “The Day in Question.” First of all, Will and I would like to thank everyone who has listened to this series of Dude Watches. We had a ton of fun watching […]

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Dude Watches – 11-22-63 – S1E7

June 1, 2016
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Podcast: Play in new window | DownloadSubscribe: iTunes | Android | RSSHi everybody! This week, we’re back with episode 7 of Stephen King’s 11.22.63, “Soldier Boy“–not to be confused at all with Soulja Boy! We pick up the discussion following Jake’s brutal beat down by the Texas Bookies. Jake drifts in and out of conscious […]

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