I was born 34 years ago on a balmy October morning in California where I spent none of my youth. I was always awkward with girls. I had to take square-dancing in gym class in 6th grade. My favorite dinosaur has always been the stegosaurus. I can’t grow much facial hair. I curse too much and sometimes make my wife cry because my words form faster than my thoughts. I’m a terrible story-teller. I’m married, and a father, and dread the thought of my daughter’s college-aged Spring Breaks.

Email Will at [email protected]!